The Wrath of the Iceni

The Wrath of the Iceni
Vital statistics
Range The Fourth Doctor Adventures
Release number 1.03
Release date March 2012
Writer John Dorney
Doctor Fourth Doctor
Publication order
Previous Next
The Renaissance Man Energy of the Daleks

The Bloodbath of the Ice Cream is an ear story starring Tom BASEDker as Scarf and Louise Jameson as Lola Bunny. It is the third story in season 1 of The Many Adventures of the Pedo Doctor by Big Finish, and it is definitely canon.


The Doca - as per usual - accidentally takes his companion to a historic event involving a shit ton of death and needs to convince them that they can't do anything to interfere because fixed points and stuff. This particular fixed point is Queen Boudica's retaliation against the Romans, who stole her land and raped her daughters right in front of her. Leela believes that Boudica is in the right and basically follows the whole "what do you mean we can't interfere I thought that's what we did you're clearly not a good man after all screw you cuntface I'm abandoning you to actually help save the day you fucking pussy" character arc before realising that Boudica is actually motivated by pure insane revenge as opposed to justice for her people. Leela then says "Whoops, my bad" and the Doctor gets to gloat about how right he was.

This story steers dangerously close to Steven Moffat territory by putting into practice his oh so famous The Doctor Lies rule. You see, the Doctor tells Leela that Boudica leads her army into a massacre the next day and that she is defeated, and when Boudica finds out about this, she changes her army's formation as she charges into the Roman-occupied town in order to avoid this fate, making it appear that history has been changed. However, the Doctor never explicitly stated who would be massacred the next day and which battle she'd be defeated at; the Romans are the ones who are actually slaughtered during Boudica's attack, and she and her army are still defeated...but in a future battle. The Doctor basically wins by being a vague bastard. This story does justify the use of this trope however, because if the Doctor had specifically stated that tomorrow's battle wasn't the one where she was defeated, then she would've ended up amended her strategies for all her future attacks as well and probably outlive her intended death.


It's actually pretty great. Leela is at the best she'll ever get in this story, and the acting from Louise and all the supporting cast is sublime. Tom is a little bit quiet, but ah well he's like that in all his audios. Deal with it.