The Ribos Operation

The Ribos Operation
Season: 16
Episode: 1
Vital statistics
Air date 2 - 23 September 1978
Written by Robert Holmes
Directed by George Spenton-Foster
Episode guide
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The Ribos Operation was the first story in a Season-long arc known as Doctor Who and the quest to get some jewels. It starred Tony Baked as the Dokadocdock, his new replacement K9 sextoy, and it was also the debut of the Not Lalla Romana. Together, the three of them basically did a more stylish, less shitty version of Time Heist.


"We've got to collect five more pieces of this shit?"

The White Guardian is a homo who wants to propose to his interracial partner but unfortunately he's way too fabulous to get off his fancy lawn chair and buy a diamond, so he instead sends his sassy fag hag friend to accompany the Doctor to go get one. Using one of Whitey's anal vibrators, they detect a particularly valuable rock inside a royal collection on the planet Ribos. Unfortunately there are some dudes planning on taking the rock for profit and shit, and the Dokah and Fred (yeah she's trans) have gotta snatch it before they do, by hiding in a maze of the dead with some old hobo.


A big ball of fluff with a tin.

Pretty decent, actually. Despite the occasional poor looking monster costume (which would become a running trend in this season), the production on this story was a serious step up from Season 15's shoddy CSO blue screen attempts, and the sets look like they could actually pass for some royal collection. Also, snow. Also, Romana gets a fine-ass coat. Romana herself is instantly very likable as a cocky but objective-focused individual, further slinging shit at the notion that "WAAAHHH, ALL CLASSIC COMPANIONS WERE DITHERY SCREAMY BITCHES WITH NO INDEPENDENCE OR PERSONALITY". Tom's great too, but c'mon now, when isn't he?