Hide

Hide
Technically the shortest Doctor Who title ever, depending on how you count 42.
Technically the shortest Doctor Who title ever, depending on how you count 42.
Season: 7
Episode: 9
Vital statistics
Air date 20 April 2013
Written by Neil Cross
Directed by Jamie Payne
Episode guide
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Cold War Journey to the Centre of the TARDIS

Hide was the ninth episode of Series 7. It stars a foot and a skirt.

It's really bad and extremely disappointing. 9/10

Plot

It's Listen, only with a spooky monster. Also, linetrap shows up as a psychic, shortly before she starred as Verity Lambert.

Eleven and Wide-face visit a spooky haunted house. There's tons of spooking here, it's frankly too spooky. They harass and TRIGGER a veteran while he's trying to ghost-hunt, then the Doctor just basically solves the mystery that's driven this man's life in the course of about 15 minutes of actual work. Clara gets a whole different kind of spook when she realizes the Doctor walks in eternity and that to him, she's already a ghost. BRAVO CROSS.

Psychic Verity informs Clara that the doctor has some spotty instances of black ice inside him that may result in delays of up to a half hour on certain routes. The two of them also confirm that whisky is the 11th most disgusting thing in the world, just above heterosexual relationships and just below white males. She also informs the Doctor that Clara is just your regular, average, run of the mill normal girl.

In the end, it turns out that all the monster really wanted was a mate. The Doctor lets him keep and breed Clara over and over until she's spent, and ends the episode by going and picking up another Clara echo from a similar time period. He also finds the future descendant of the guest characters and brings her back to cockblock her ancestors for the rest of their lives. Shhhhh: It's totally the plot of Listen.

Trivia

  • Neil Cross wanted the Doctor to meet Bernard Quatermass but he couldn't get the rights, so he settled for stealing another,, Quatermass-less, story by Nigel IKneale, The Stone Tape.
  • Features the return of the Metebelis Crystal, though you wouldn't know that from how Smith mangles the pronunciation.