Argon Aesthetic


WARNING: This page is entirely fictional. Any relation to real people, places, events, someone that can't take a joke or understand satire, etc. are coincidental.

ArgonAesthetic is a master of the art of creating Doctor Who fan title sequences, masterful works of CGI that frequently put the animators working for the BBC to shame with their sheer panache.

It has been said that her ultimate dream in life is to be noticed by her senpai the BBC and finally launch into a career of blowing fans' minds with her incredible one-woman effects work.

The 6 key steps to being ArgonAesthetic

Her process was once eloquently summarised by one of her many fans on Youtube under the following five bullet points:

  1. "Get every single model you've got and throw them constantly at the screen - make it as cluttered as possible. That way it'll trick the audience into thinking it's good."
  1. "Look down in the comment section below, and if you see even the slightest bit of negative criticism, rip into them as much as possible. Write a ten-page essay on why they're a fucking moron and you're supreme."
  1. "If someone you don't like uploads their own title sequence, send all of your fanboys and fangirls over there to rip into them as much as possible for no reason [...] Or, if you haven't got many fans, just use alts. It's fine, no-one will know."
  1. "Upload the same title sequence over and over and over again, I'm pretty sure they didn't see it the first time."
  1. "And finally, if another title sequence on Youtube is chosen over yours to be in the official Doctor Who show, just cry. Cry into the five hundred spare hoodies you have lying about for some reason with your name on. They'll absorb all the tears."

To show her appreciation for the above now-immortalised quotations, ArgonAesthetic proceeded to attempt to have the video taken down for abusing her brand name (despite the brand name not being present anywhere in the video or description), followed by accusing the uploader of harassment and sending hundreds of her tweets (including innocuous personal ones) to the police. Argon also posted a Facebook message to herself and screencapped it pretending it was from the police department. UPDATE 26/08: Also apparently Argon tried to dox the guy and either she or her psycho 'fans' (see below) have successfully gotten the victim's Twitter suspended.Which brings us to the 6th key step, that the video unfortunately failed to hit upon.

6. Be completely fucking BATSHIT INSANE.

What makes ArgonAesthetic's videos so...unique?

You could spend pages and pages analysing how Argon's effects-heavy glossy videos manage to be uglier and more worthless than even the meager official BBC-budgeted title sequences. The contrast is especially noticeable given how much of her time she spends creating her own versions of the latest official titles; if you were to watch her take on the 2014 Capaldi 'clock' intro, for example, you'd be sure to find completely botched interpretations of everything from the colour scheme to the momentum of the camera.

Anyone who has wasted enough of their life watching Aesthetic's latest masterpieces will be familiar with that one with the asteroid belt and the 10000000 versions of it she did. Her defining aesthetic seems to be 'as much shit flying at the viewer as possible, as long as it's processed to fuck and back'. I'd link some examples here but let's not give her any more views, eh?


In spite of all this, Argon has somehow attracted a loyal fanbase (assuming they aren't all just her sockpuppets) who are entranced by his Michael Bay-esque visual overloads of METEORS FUCKING EVERYWHERE, and shared in her anal devastation when based Billy Hanshaw had his actually attractive and slightly original fan sequence adapted by the BBC. Assuming they exist, they can also be seen having a go at whoever Argon has sicced them on last. A key characteristic of them is that they seem to exist in an alternate reality where anyone who breathes a word against Aesthetic is an abusive (and ugly, don't forget ugly) psychopath who must be destroyed.